The Thirteenth Dimension
I think I broke the knob
The Dimension Of Sound In Hi-Fi Stereo
presents
The A-13 Sonic Translator


This amazing hand-held device may look like just another hit counter, but it is actually much less useful than that. This A-13 Sonic Translator is the product of minutes of arduous avoidance of meaningful work. Powered by the SID chip from an old VIC-20, this miracle of outdated science is able to translate the super-high frequency lyrics embedded in many of Man... or Astro-man?'s songs into human audible ranges. The result is an enhanced appreciation of yogurt, and a deeper respect for what is often considered by the ignorant masses as a mostly instrumental band. Fools!


Escape Velocity

"Diameter 4.9 miles, mass over 6000 megatons, and speed of 1,750 miles per second"
"And destination Earth"

The man in the moon
Has sent all his goons
And like a cartoon, I can't reach Escape Velocity
Jupiter's baddest
Keep sayin' we've had it
And I'm on a planet that's known for its atrocities

Decimate!
The human race is overwhelmed
Obliterate!
The planet's future depends on them

This old dimestore rocket
Feels sluggish in the dock
If I find a self-serve socket
Rev it to escape velocity
I'll make it to Venus
With a Stuckey's between us
If they ask, you haven't seen us
Maybe I'll make it,
I've got to make it go

I think my plasma froze
Looks like my nitrous is low
My rental comet is blown
Let's make this starship go!

The man in the moon
Has sent all his goons
And like a cartoon, I can't reach Escape Velocity
Jupiter's baddest
Keep sayin' we've had it
And I'm on a planet that's known for its atrocities

Evacuate!
This quadrant's ruled by aliens
Stay up late!
I'm on the two-way with my space friends

My buddies on Venus
Say debris stands between us
If they ask, you haven't seen us
Maybe I'll make it,
I've got to make it go

My radar's clogged with snow
The eagle's climbing slow
The radio's on low (fi, that is)
Let's make this starship go!

The Interplanet House of Gum ahead
Has everything I need except a bed
No time for that
My favorite tourist trap is on the right
Their statues made of Pez are outta sight